I hate my job. No surprise there but I leave work a couple days a week and cry in my car before I can drive home. That is not a good sign.

I am will interview for the job I applied for 4 weeks ago sometime in the next two weeks. I am almost finished with the 5th major 24 hours training I have written in 15 months and preparing for the 6th.

I have decided on the music I am going to sing for one of the in class concerts and the recital at school: the first one is Danny Boy. Long time readers may say, um...didn't you sing that last year? Um...yes but I forgot the words to the third verse and kind of hummed along until I remember them. I want to redeem myself in my own eyes.

The second song is the Eva Cassidy version of over the rainbow. It is just beautiful and I love it. I hope to be able to do it justice. I am sure it will not sound like Ms. Cassidy as she had an amazing ethereal, jazzy, sexy voice but I am going to try. I practiced for an hour today and got the two rough parts down. There will be one more piece to practice and I have a month or so. The hard part is really getting the breathing down which is why I purchased and decided on this song. Maybe I can post something here and get some comments.

Because I am so unhappy at work I have begun avoiding friends and family. I just don’t want to be around people because I feel like I will snap and say something me because of the pressure and frustration of my job. I also have not been paying attention to spending for the past three months have blown a lot of money I needed to save for a ouse an debt payments. I have not gone to the gym in three months either. I already have a plan of action for getting a new job because a whole new job, new agency, new place of work means a whole change in my schedule and life.

I have two state position exams coming up as well. Both are still in my classification and are promotions (one over the other). While I am prepared to do the job of one, the other is a bit high. I just want to take the exam to see if I can get on the list and see what happens. I believe that I am still a little out of my league for that one. Knowing the people in that sector I would be about 15 ears younger than the next person. How strange it would be to manage people older than me. (and some with more experience.) I have seen the training products that come out of this particular office and it stinks. Maybe I could help to turn that around for the agency. Who knows.
I have a whole chapter of homework and 65 quizzes to do this weekend. It is a lot of work but if I pace myself I’ll be ok. The real estate class if quite boring and the instructor is just horrible but it is pretty easy. The other class is not so easy.

Oh and my friend moved from Hawaii to Michigan! She passed through on Tuesday and it was so nice to see her after almost a year. We are planning for a long visit for me once she gets settled, maybe during thanksgiving week. I could go for a week and only use 2 vacation days so that would be nice. But the frustrating part was that I just saved enough to come and visit her in Hawaii!

I am completly frustrated with the US government for agreeing to these stop gap measure with or money. Currently our national debt stands around 9.4 trillion (yes trillion) dollars. Enough for each person to owe about $32,000 to pay it off. Now we are going to add another half a trillion to it. I made the decision not to buy a house or make poor investments. Now i wish i had. Some of the investment minds think the government may end up makign a profit on the purchase of the mortgages and assisting banks. It just pisses me off that the money is going there. isn't free enterprise mean, if you screw up then you have to

I am going to crawl into bed, listen to a movie for a while and go to bed before 11.